I am so dreading college this fall. First off I'm signed up for classes in the engineering program and honors college for the top two % so I'm nervous about the course load and I don't even know if I'm sure about doing engineering anymore. Secondly I almost denied that honors program and all it's benefits because I have to live in a housing wing with only other kids and the program and I really wanted to room with my friend who's a year older than me and I complained enough to the director that they let me. That's just the tip of the iceberg. The real stress is coming from my friends . No one in my close friend group is going to school anywhere near me, I'd wish we all had gone to the same school even if I had to major ok something that didn't interest me, I hate change I. Hate meeting new people I find talking to people in a group more than 4 exhausting. Actually it's always kind of exhausting to talk to anyone except my girlfriend. She's probably why I'm the most stressed. We've been dating for a year now and we love each other very much. I'm so nervous that she's not gonna want to do long distance. She is going to school 7!hours away from me. If we break up I don't know what I'll do with my self. I'll probably either turn to drugs and alcohol or kill myself. I'd do anything for her if I had been in a situation where a maniac would either kill my friends and family and their family or hit my girlfriend. I'd rather my friends and family killed. I know she loves me but I'm worried that I might care about her more than she cares about me. The last time I went to a big party I had to leave because people kept spilling drinks on me, bumping into me and being loud I was ready to snap someone's neck I was shaking with how anxious I was I got home and my blood pressure was 190 over 140. I wish I had decided a while ago to go to the same school as her so I wouldn't be so anxious about college. Hanging out in groups of 4 is the largest group I am comfortable with. I would much rather be with her than do anything else. Even if we were just sitting in silence with each other. Please I need advice on how to get though college in one piece.!!!
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