I have not been on here in a while and most of you probably don't know who I am, but to be honest, I don't really know where else to turn
anyway, it finally happened tonight, something that I've been sensing might happen for a while recently and have been dreading it, but the cat's out of the bag, my father knows I'm not the good little Christian boy he always thought I was, while I did not flat out say "I'm an atheist" I "disrespected" God and because of that I'm full of darkness and will probably go to hell (I'll be in good company at least)
I haven't been a Christian for a long time, not since in fact 2006, the year I joined here and I have this site and the atheists here to partly thank, so good job guys!
I used to have a very strong faith, but only because I lived in isolation, once I got the internet and started to read things from the other side my faith popped like a balloon stuck with a needle (though I was in denial with myself for years before I finally had the courage to admit it), but I've had to lie to my parents and play along, we're not a Church going family thankfully but I've had to pray when asked to and simply put on airs that I still believe
here's the main problem though, my father is a little bit crazy and he's obsessed with the "end times" and believes that they will finally happen this very year, why? well he says that Iran and Israel are about to go war which will lead to a nuclear war between Russian and America (it's a looooong story) which result in the deaths of millions in nuclear fire while every good little Christian gets Raptured to heaven
I've had to deal with this shit literally my entire life, he's stuck in this Cold War mentality that a nuclear war must happen between Russia and America no matter what because it's foreordained by God, he knows this because he's read it in the book of Revelations, hallelujah my brothers nuclear Holocaust draws near!
fucked up isn't it? well it's gotten especially bad recently due to this Iran thing (is it really a thing or is it just his paranoid imagination?) and I finally snapped tonight, I just can't take any more of his bullshit
now I'm afraid I'm gonna get kicked out, why do I still live with my folks? well, it's a long story and believe me I wish I didn't, but that's the reality of my life and I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do, I'm frightened
I'm also fucking heartbroken, I love my father and I always thought we had a good relationship but it's clear to me now that he loves his God more than he loves his son
please, any help or advice at all would be much appreciated
anyway, it finally happened tonight, something that I've been sensing might happen for a while recently and have been dreading it, but the cat's out of the bag, my father knows I'm not the good little Christian boy he always thought I was, while I did not flat out say "I'm an atheist" I "disrespected" God and because of that I'm full of darkness and will probably go to hell (I'll be in good company at least)
I haven't been a Christian for a long time, not since in fact 2006, the year I joined here and I have this site and the atheists here to partly thank, so good job guys!
I used to have a very strong faith, but only because I lived in isolation, once I got the internet and started to read things from the other side my faith popped like a balloon stuck with a needle (though I was in denial with myself for years before I finally had the courage to admit it), but I've had to lie to my parents and play along, we're not a Church going family thankfully but I've had to pray when asked to and simply put on airs that I still believe
here's the main problem though, my father is a little bit crazy and he's obsessed with the "end times" and believes that they will finally happen this very year, why? well he says that Iran and Israel are about to go war which will lead to a nuclear war between Russian and America (it's a looooong story) which result in the deaths of millions in nuclear fire while every good little Christian gets Raptured to heaven
I've had to deal with this shit literally my entire life, he's stuck in this Cold War mentality that a nuclear war must happen between Russia and America no matter what because it's foreordained by God, he knows this because he's read it in the book of Revelations, hallelujah my brothers nuclear Holocaust draws near!
fucked up isn't it? well it's gotten especially bad recently due to this Iran thing (is it really a thing or is it just his paranoid imagination?) and I finally snapped tonight, I just can't take any more of his bullshit
now I'm afraid I'm gonna get kicked out, why do I still live with my folks? well, it's a long story and believe me I wish I didn't, but that's the reality of my life and I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do, I'm frightened
I'm also fucking heartbroken, I love my father and I always thought we had a good relationship but it's clear to me now that he loves his God more than he loves his son
please, any help or advice at all would be much appreciated